retreating.

spent the weekend on a women's retreat with my mom. new church for her...sort of a checking it out kind of thing. the theme was home, each session revolving around the story of the prodigal son. i am always a little bit leary/jealous when people talk about their favorite stories and verses but i guess it's true that this chapter of the bible...luke 15...is one that brings me a particular amount of peace and comfort.

there was a lot of talk this weekend about God's love. how he runs to us, how he embraces us. it all made a lot of sense in my head.

i just couldn't get it to connect to my heart.

i can't figure out who i am in the story right now. we studied rembrandt's painting of the story and i tried so hard to resonate somewhere. i kept feeling like they were in a barn in the painting. i know i'm there, i'm sure i'm a part of this story, this event, this whole deal with a father and his kids.

but the only place that i could find myself today was a daughter in a dark corner watching someone else's story.